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Braving the unknown. I wonder and I wander.

January 15, 2014

All the single ladies (and men)

* a letter for myself and for my friends who are being asked with "Bakit hindi ka pa nag aasawa?"



Dear Yannah,

I can see that you feel worried that life is passing you by -- that most of your batchmates and even those who are younger than you are settling down, having kids and getting married.. but come on, you are young! relax! Age is just a number and its not a midlife crisis. Mom said that you will met people on the road who are 10 years older than you, single and having the best time of their life, so don't rush. don´t get pressured by the society´s stereotype. Believe me, you are very young!

I understand what you feel, but its ok, Honor what you feel and pat yourself on the back knowing that you are taking a step towards the right direction. the right person will come, the right place will emerge and you will attract all the positive opportunities that the world has to offer. for now, take care of yourself and be responsible with your life. Handle everything in a matured manner.

In a relationship, totally single or member of NBSB ka man (no boyfriend since birth) -- Slow down! enjoy every moment while your single! (not yet married). Mas marami kang oras to do things than those who are married(pustahan? Ask your friends na nagsipag asawa na.haha) While waiting for the right time, why don’t you do things on your bucketlist. Travel!  Keep having adventures, even by yourself. Camp in Mt.Pulag, get lost in Mt Iraya in Batanes, wander  at Zamboanga Peninsula, experience the amazing view in Batad and Sagada, swim with the Butandings in Donsol,  Take pictures, laugh, be silly, be happy, make funny faces, be crazy! Go to war but study the warzone carefully and never keep your guard down.

While waiting for that "someone" to pop the“will you marry me” line, why don’t you take your time to make friends and gain insights and new perspectives. Organize a reunion party with childhood friends, elementary berks, hischool barkadas and your college tropas. I bet, these things are just some of those many things na mahirap nang magawa ng mga kaibigan mong “married”. I bet you’ll be stressed pag ikaw na ang bibitaw ng linyang: “hindi ako pwede, walang bantay ang mga anak ko” or “subukan ko, magpapaalam muna ako kay mister/misis”. 

Instread of worrying, why don’t you learn how to speak Italian fluently, or why not learn how to cook, how to sing or how to paint, when you already know, teach! you can go back to school, earn a Master Degree, take a vocational courses. Your still single, no kids to attend to, no husband/wife to worry about, you practically have all the time to do all these before settling down.

Self care is important. While doing all these things on your bucket list and waiting for that “right time” you need to be healthy, yeah you should eat healthy, sleep early and drink lots of water. Don’t be on a diet or a killer exercise. Continue your daily jogging routine, do yoga under the tree, try kick boxing, try mastering meditation like the Buddha boy, and most of all, don´t forget how sharing laughther with family and friends has always helped you to have a sound mind and body.

As you go one with your life, remember the people who matter to you most. Your Parents, your siblings, your fiancé, your friends. they are the ones who understand you, yes more than you can imagine. Talk to them regularly, update them with your life, share what you feel, tell them how much you love them. Always be grateful because you have all the reasons to be. Relax, appreciate and always tell yourself that life is beautiful, have some quite time. Listen to what your heart is saying but be logical too.

Being on your late 20’s and bein’ asked over and over “when will you marry?” or being told “ga pay gurang ka na, saarin ka maagom?”  (you’r getting old, when are you getting married?”), this may somehow make you lonely, and feel disappointed with your partner or with the world, agin, don’t rush!  never do something dictated by others or by the society because all your life, you understand yourself better than anyone.  

So when you feel lonely, cross your arms close to your bossom and hug yourself. PRAY. You will feel very good, you´ll see., because There´s no other powerful connection in this world than getting in touch with the Higher Being. Talk, say thank you, ask nicely, seek for guidance. Along with this, do not lose your relationship with the Universe. As long as you are not craving obsessively, you will get what you want from them, one step at a time. Remeber what The Beatles told you? "There will be an answer so let it be."


Brace yourself. Life at 30 is a beginning of something wonderful. :)


Love,

Yannah




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